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I didn't exactly know how to celebrate my 4 year blogiversary. I haven't felt like much of a blogger lately. I've only published 7 blogposts this year. That's a very embarrassing number knowing that there are times where I managed to post 25 blog posts in one month. I know we're supposed to be celebrating my little corner of the internet but life hasn't been very exciting lately. I guess this blogpost will be more of a life update than a celebration but I am in the process of trying to get my life together so do expect quite a few cheerful posts in the near future.

I started this blog over 4 years ago. I had no idea what I was doing but I quickly fell in love with blogging. It's been my way of documenting my life. Life has been one hell of a roller coaster ride with more downs than ups but I've always tried to keep my blog as happy and cheerful as I can. I guess one gets to a point where you just need to take a break from everything and that's exactly what I decided to do. I wasn't sure what I was doing with my blog anymore, school was getting hectic and life wasn't getting any better. I just got overwhelmed by everything and thought stepping away from my blog for a while was the best option. I don't think I ever fully recovered from my break because my blog posts became less frequent when I came back from my break.

2015 was such a bad year for me. I don't know how I managed to make it through it. 2016 was okay and 2017 was slightly better. Things weren't great but it could've been worse. Unfortunately, things took a turn for the worst at the end of November last year and it feels like everything keeps going downhill. There are so many things happening that are out of my control and the simplest way to put it is that everything just sucks right now and I'm not even being dramatic.

My goal for 2018 was to just have fun and make money. I haven't made money but I have been trying to have fun by actually participating in life. You may have noticed that I've been quite active on my YouTube channel which is one of the few things that's been going my way this year. The downside of doing all these things is that they only bring temporary joy. Which is why I'm changing my goal for 2018 to finding happiness.

At this point in my life I feel lost and confused. Almost as though I'm just drifting without a purpose and trust me it's a very sad way to live. I got to a point where I had to decide whether I want to give up or try harder. So, this is my second attempt at this life thing. I'm giving myself and my blog a second chance. I just want to be able to have my little corner of sunshine and happiness.

Right now, at this very moment, I'm still sad and life is a disaster but I'm working on changing my mindset. I'm sorry for this long and boring blog post. I just needed to get all of these things out of my system. From now I'll be sending positive vibes and hopefully the universe will do the same. I will also working on accomplishing my 2017 goals so that's exciting!

Thank you to every person who reads my blog. Here's to many more years in the blogoshpere!

Last week I got my first tattoo. If you follow me on Twitter and Instagram you probably already know this. If you don't, you should probably follow me, it's @TheTshegofatso on both. The decision to get a tattoo was spontaneous. I've always wanted a tattoo and I always thought my first tattoo would be of sentimental value but a few days before I got my tattoo I came across the exact same tattoo that I got on Tumblr and I thought it looked cute. I told my sister about it and she said we should get matching tattoos and of course I said yes. 

We got our tattoos at Tattoo Styles at Menlyn. I think it was slightly expensive as we paid R250 each. However, on the plus side they don't require you to make an appointment. The whole process was quick and simple. The tattoo took about two minutes. Everything they tell you about tattoos being painful is true. Those two minutes were the worst two minutes of my life. I felt like I went to hell and back. Pretty hurts and no pain, no gain. We all know the rules. 

I'm so happy I actually went through with it. My whole family was there by side so it was a cool experience. I might get a few more tattoos in the future but the pain has frightened me away for a while. I'm currently using the Tattoo Addicted Natural Beeswax after care to take care of my tattoo as it heals. 

Shout out to 2018 for making me tick off some items on my bucket list. I'm officially tatted up and living my best life.

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Ever since this year began I have been focusing on being happy. I think it's one of the only New Year's Resolutions I've actually stuck to. Now that I'm nineteen(woah), I just want to continuing to be genuinely happy. 

Eighteen was a really good year for me. I stopped focusing on all the terrible things that have happened and started participating in life. It's one of the best decisions I have ever made. I'm still in the process of learning and growing but I'm happy with where I'm headed. 

One thing I want to continue working on is my confidence. It's something that I've always struggled with but I'm making progress. You gotta fake it until you make it. 

This is my last year as a teenager. I'm not going to lie it's scary. I'm not ready for the real world. I have no idea what I'm doing with my life. I'm taking it one step at a time. The plan is to be a little selfish and do more of what fills me with joy. Here's to nineteen and becoming a carefree black girl.

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When 2018 began I wasn't entirely sure what my plan for the year was. I tried applying for learnerships and a few other things but nothing worked out. So, I decided to head the university route.

It's been a month since I started university and it's nothing like high school. I still feel quite overwhelmed and I'm trying to adjust. It's a lot to process. It feels like a series of tests and assignments and then more tests and assignments. I also have the worst timetable, I finish school at 17:30 everyday. It hurts me so much whenever I think about. 

Somewhere in the whole process of starting university I realised that I'm an adult now and this is my life. I can't keep putting things off for a later stage because this is real life and time doesn't wait for anyone. So, I've just been trying to live my best and it's the best decision I ever made. 

University is a lot of work and that's a fact but it's all worth it in the end, right? I guess it's all about balance. Work hard, play harder. That's the plan. I'm a strong, independent woman so, I'll survive. 

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